*allow me to introduce myself*

Yes, I’m aware that the time is 21:00 GMT lol, but I was loving my Sunday nap, a tad too much and totally forgot to post this earlier. As promised, myself and someone else are teaming up this month to share some thoughts on a topic. This week, there wasn’t a topic per say, but let me give you this insight, the whole concept of YOLO, ‘You Only Live Once’! Well, I took this saying into account this weekend and jumped on a coach to Leicester for a uni party/rave known as Barfest. Now, don’t get me wrong it was all fun, exciting etc. But also a massive L! My apologies to my older audience for my lingo, lol, a massive ‘L’ meaning a loss, for me it was a cash loss. See, the whole YOLO lifestyle comes with its positives and negatives, and for me that was mine. And well my mystery blogger this month has a somewhat contrary argument and great analogy.. But first.

Allow them to introduce themselves 🙂 (be nice guys, it’s a lil scary writing to all you peeps) . P.S. It’s gunna be a long one….

‘So boom.
As I’m about to write this, I’m taking a small amount of amusement in the fact that you have no clue of my identity at all. All I am to you guys at this very moment is just an anonymous perspective, a masked opinion, or if you like – a random point of view. In other words I want you guys not to think of me as person typing behind a screen right now, but just as a voice, and in order to make this easier I’ll just name myself after the title of each topic.
So without further ado – *allow me to reintroduce myself my name is ‘THE BLUE PILL OR THE RED PILL?’* 

Alright! So you’ve probably heard that line about the blue pill, red pill stuff before in what happens to be one of my favourite films ‘The Matrix’ (If you haven’t seen it before sorry for you, but try to when you have time, but if you know, then you know). I just want to turn that phrase into a small metaphore before I build up my point, so please bear with me.

Anyway, the idea here is that there are 2 available pills. The blue pill is very exciting because it’s quick to digest and could… allow you to achieve self satisfaction and some happiness from your actions in the short run, (so basically choosing blue means doing what you want to do, because you desire to, without thinking of the outcome). But there’s 1 possible side effect from the blue pill which is……. regret. 

The red pill is a bit less exciting and takes a bit longer to digest, which is a downer, BUT ‘WILL!’ allow you to achieve self satisfaction & confidence in your decisions you make in the long run, (so basically being confident that you chose the best option because you thought about it, regardless of what you desired).. And it has no side effect as painful as regret.

Yes you guessed it, my point is about choices. Our WHOLE ENTIRE LIFE is based on choices – from whether to turn left or right, to which university to apply for, or what food to eat etc. – all the way to the career path we choose or who to marry. We must also understand that every single little choice we make WILL! Have an outcome no matter how small it is, and whether that outcome is good or bad is up to us.
So if ‘choices’ affect our WHOLE ENTIRE LIFE… Why are we not more serious about them? Surely we should spend a bit more time trying to make the correct ones right? 

If we choose the blue pill and digest decisions quickly based on how we feel or our desires, although we may be happy in the short run there’s a higher risk involved that the decision you make is more wrong than it is right, which will lead to regret or may even affect others around us negatively L. In the future we don’t want to regret a bad choice we made years ago just because it made us ‘happy’ in the moment. However, if you take the red pill then you shouldn’t experience the side effect of regret (that is.. if you took it properly), because it should mean that you’re taking a bit longer to digest your decisions properly before acting, and your actions aren’t based solely on how you feel, what you want or what will give you happiness in the short run, but instead what would benefit your life most and others around you most. 

Another twist we have to consider after making the decision to think before we act, is that making the correct choice is always the hardest and may not make you as happy as the blue pill in the short run but we have to remember that happiness is temporary. It runs out when you stop feeding it your wants and desires. But the reward you gain from making the correct choice is greater. How Ironic, because I’m probably the last person to be writing about correct choices but at the same time I’m a working progress too. I came up with a small abbreviation to drum into my head to better my decision making on a daily, which you guys can use as well. 

E.B.A – ‘evaluate before action’. It’s quick and easy to use, but we have to be consistent for it to work… so before you act, just think ‘EBA’.

We can sit back and say at the end of the day “oh it’s just life, we make bad choices sometimes but we learn from it”. Yes… that statement is definitely spot on in a sense, especially in most of our lives, but at the same time we can reduce the significance of that statement in our lives by replacing the word ‘sometimes’ in that sentence, with the word ‘rarely’ – only if we evaluate our decisions before action. 

So my last note is for the aff’s out there -I’m guessing if you’re more of a pounded yam person, today is the day you chose E.B.A. ‘

Yours Truly,

Praise’ Gbemisola x
   
 

What’s coming next? 

Hey y’all, How are you all doing? 

I don’t know what is it today, maybe it’s the fact I’m physically, mentally drained after my exams or the fact I didn’t make it to church this morning because of my AWFUL sleeping pattern. You see, insomnia is the worst kind of sickness. But I’m here, at 19:00pm or so, still in bed! Enjoyment right? 

So I didn’t want to leave you guys with nothing today, and although this is not a post per say, it’s just a lil something. Now I have something to share with you all, so what do you want first, the good or the bad? *waits a few seconds* lol okay, for me, you can’t appreciate the good without experiencing the bad so here goes… Here comes the bad news.

Unfortunately, starting from February, I will only be blogging twice a month, that means it will most likely be every two weeks, any other time you hear from me will be what I would like to call a bonus. The thing with blogging or sharing, recording or writing is you have to have something to write, an idea. And unfortunately I don’t always have that and even if I do, I don’t have enough time to execute the post how I want it. But excuses aside, the main reason for this is because uni is getting tougher, more work, more deadlines, less free time basically. So I figured the solution would be limiting my posts to twice every month and being consistent in doing so. So there you have it,the the bad news.

Now for the good news, I’ve reached over 2,500 views on this blog! It’s actually AMAZING. It really exceeded my wildest dreams so thank you all. I’m so excited to get better and actually here from you all, so please feel free to drop a comment or ask questions. Also, in the coming months or so I’m teaming up with an anonymous blogger who will be sharing he/her views with you as well as mine and I give you the task of identifying whether they are male or female. So yes, them alongside me will share our views on topics such as relationships, education and faith. So that should be fun! Please look out for it in Feb.

I hope everyone had a lovely lovely Sunday and once again thank you for being a part of my dream. I really appreciate each and everyone of you. 
Yours truly,
Praise’Gbemisola x

   

  

  

The Night Shift

Right, so I know I always say “this will be a short post today” but for one reason or another, I cant help but write LOOOOAAADDDDSSSSS! But you’ll never guess what? I actually mean it this time. Well I’ll try to stick to it. Its so funny how when we’re given a 1500 word essay or a 10000 word dissertation or a 6000 word EPQ summary we literally struggle to just write a mere 100 words. But it is well ooo, having said this I have a 1000 word reflective report to write and have I started? Well all you guys in uni will know everything is left to the last minute. But that doesn’t make that a good thing. Procrastination is such a horrible thing! Absolutely horrid thing, such a bad character flaw. Saying this, I’m sat on my  chair, laptop on lap, spinning around and just looking at the pile of washing I need to do, makeup I need to clear away, clothes I need to fold, a bed I need to lay and most importantly books I need to read, past papers I need to complete and like I mentioned an essay I need to actually begin. Yeah, you’ve guessed it, I would be what my friend would call ‘an unserious candidate’, I don’t even know whether its laziness, tiredness or the horrid P word, and no, not me as in Praise but Procrastination.

Ah Praise, you’ve done it again, just rambled on! ARGHHHHH! I cant help it, its like when I put fingers to a keypad whether it be my phone or Maci, my laptop (yes, I name my devices LOL) its like a rhythm forms, a melody that is so catchy that I just want to keep repeating, in this case, keep typing  but I actually need to stop! LOL.

That takes me to todays post. As many of you will know, especially my university church family, you’ll know as of 1:20pm earlier today, I didn’t have any material for todays post, any direction or ideas, I probably would have given it a miss but thanks to people encouraging me, Im pushing on, even if I am writing complete rubbish. And there I go, just rambling… Gosh Praise (gets up from seat and flicks side of head).

Now on a serious note, I really struggled with thinking of todays post, it probably is because all that is in my thoughts right now is just exam related, physics equations, maths problems, diagrams, the life of an engineering student *sigh*. But then I thought, lets go to the basics, what do I do when I don’t know what to do? And for me, its the night shift. No, I don’t have a job that operates on a shift rota but I dedicate time at my favourite time of the day to record my thoughts, do my work, have quiet time with God, set new goals and check if the goals I’ve noted down the night before have been achieved by that time. For me, my revision is most successful at night, in the early hours of the morning. My flatmates call it an awful sleeping pattern, doctors call it severe insomnia but I just prefer the term night shift. I’ve come to realise something, its so important to do what works for you. Not for anyone else but you. Still being at the beginning of this year, I’m so mindful of the goals I have set for 2016, my financial goals, spiritual goals, academic goals and social/recreational goals. Its through this that through every night shift, I have the energy, the drive to push forward, just like what Im doing now in this post. Its so easy to get distracted, most times we don’t even realise and before we know it we’ve gone off course. I cant stress how important it is to dedicate time in a day to just focus on yourself, time to evaluate everything and put things in place to make a better tomorrow. The saying I have decided to live by this year is this “the fact I’m still alive, means I have another opportunity to put things right or in place”. That’s why I cherish my night shift, because its really a gift to sleep and wake up the next morning, so I don’t ever want to sleep. I want to keep pressing on, making things right so that if by chance I get the miracle of sleeping and waking up in good health, I can make that day the best day I’ve lived yet.

So what am I saying? Time is precious. Utilise it. Its so easy to say we don’t have enough time in a day to achieve all we want to but we have 24 hours more than a person in a grave, that’s just died or a person that’s sick in a hospital. Take time out to make plans, to put things in order and guarantee a successful life. For me, my key to success is prayer. Someone once told me when I was preparing for my Year 6 SATS all those years ago, that ‘Prayerful Preparation Prevents Poor Performance’, and till this day, its stuck with me.

Now for all those doing exams, this is just a small bit of encouragement. You can do it and you will do it! Your success is guaranteed if you begin to put things for your future in place right now. And that’s me done, another long post -_-.

 

Yours Truly,

Praise’Gbemisola x

 

Stars can’t shine without darkness

A somewhat short post today guys, please ignore any errors, literally posted this half asleep and between a break from uni work and exams which are just taking over but yeahh……

 
Waking up, going through my daily dose of Instagram and BAM! There it was, my next blog post. I stumbled across one of the people I follow, a YouTuber I believe and she had captioned one of her pictures as this ‘Stars can’t shine without darkness’, and there we had it, today’s blog post. I quickly scribbled this into my dairy and added it to my notes page on my phone. So here, I am on a train back from Manchester, with my fellow engineering classmate returning back to University after being in Manchester for Festival of Praise which may I add was AMAZING! But yeah, here I am, writing this. I actually struggled to find a direction to write in, but then my thoughts took me to something and I quickly realised this post would be perfect for Black History Month which is in October in UK. However, I couldn’t wait till then..

 
I love this quote why? Because to me, the lady I took it from was talking about her skin. Being a black female in England who saw the beauty in her skin colour and it was from that, that I realised we had to love everything we’ve been given and made with. Now, as many of you may know, I’m actually a textile artist who studied art at both GCSE and A Level, so I like images or at least forming them in your mind. Let’s take a potter for example.. Gathering the clay, putting it on the wheel and for hours sitting there, preening it to perfection, despite the dirty, dry hands or the crackling skin or the occasional splatters of wet clay or slip! Just patiently sitting there, making sure the end product is what they originally planned out. That’s like our creator, our God. The way he created us, created every hair on our heads, our finger nails, every cut and crease in our bodies, so we could come out as perfect as he anticipated. And boy didn’t he do a great job. Come on look at yourself in the mirror.. Liking what you see yet?

 
It’s so easy to pick up on the little imperfections we have, but in an artists world, it’s the imperfections that make the masterpiece. For me, I never liked my height. It was something people always always always picked up on, but I’ve learnt to embrace it, and just buy endless pairs of heels, anyone that has come into my uni room will see the array of heels I have placed on my shelves! Another thing was my skin. Not that I didn’t love my skin colour, I was always brought up in areas where coloured skin or darker skin was the minority. Leaving Nigeria to live in South Africa as a baby, to living in Essex in London where at that time, the black people per say hadn’t migrated there, to coming to live in a small town like Luton and then being educated at schools that was hardly urban. It was difficult and it’s only now I’ve come to university that I realised that ‘stars can’t shine without darkness’. Not that the lighter skin tones or other races are nothing without us but that the beauty in our world is the diversity, no one race is better than another, we just complement one another. Sorry another word slipping out from my artistic vocab -_-. Yes we may be in a country that we can say wasn’t originally for us but look how far we’ve come, not even just our nation. Look at America, Australia, Asia. We started as the minority and now in some areas we can be seen as the majority like in my university for example. Now we can blame that on reproduction or see it as fate. How would white sportsmen excelled without having people like us to compete with? How would our country stand against others without the diversity and culture we bring like in politics? How would we have had the opportunities we have now without them?

 

Now, this post isn’t about racism or one race being more superior than another, it’s about equality and coming to the realisation that no man is an island. You can’t be an effective Union, if you aren’t an effective human? It’s not possible. It started from somewhere and we’ve been given the baton to continue the race. Not just for humanity but for our Faith as well. Start from yourself, love yourself, be both the star and the darkness. Let your talents, your strengths and achievements be the star that is shining ever so brightly. And let the darkness be your challenges, your struggles, your journey and lessons. So even if your talents fail you, you can still be the darkness to another star and help them by sharing your story. We need each other and the sooner we recognise that, the easier our lives will become. This reminds me of GCSE English back all those years ago, where we had to read the play ‘An Inspector Calls’ and the main character, Inspector Goole spoke about everyone ‘being members of the same body’. Even the Bible has something to say about this ‘ I appeal to you, brothers and sisters, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that all of you agree with one another in what you say and that there be no divisions among you, but that you be perfectly united in mind and thought’ – 1 Corinthians 1:10. So whether you are black, white, yellow, pink or even green, love yourself because by doing that you’ll be able to love others. Now, even if you think you have no talent or feature that can make you that star, share with others because after all, that’s where I started and look at me now. Being the dark backdrop for all you stars to shine on, great right?

 
Love starts from you. Start from yourself!

 

Yours truly,

 
Praise Gbemisola x

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Metanoai

Plagiarism is the one word that always rings in my head whenever I’m sat contemplating my life at uni or trying to get some work done . Why? Because that’s the only word they always seem to bang on about! As soon as I feel myself dozing in a 2 hour lecture, once I hear my lecturer form a sentence involving the beginning of the word ‘pla..’ then I quickly wake up. Frazzled of course but somewhat alert all the same. But no, I’m not gunna be doing a post on the importance of plagiarism or whatever, that’s not me just yet. But where am I getting at? That’s it, I have a confession to make…..

Well to be honest, I don’t even know if my confession is even a confession or if it even counts as one but either way here goes. I’m not proud to say this, and I’m quite embarrassed actually, mostly disappointed in myself because I was not smart enough to think of it myself. So in that sense I guess I’ve been found guilty of a crime, this is where plagiarism talk comes in, I’ve committed an offence, a serious one. I stole someones work, someones idea. Even writing this, at 02:39 am my heart is thumping, a sweat has formed across my forehead, I’m so scared, so nervous. And its obvious as to why… But why Praise, why?

Okay, so I’m rambling now and getting lost in my train of thoughts so yes, where was I? What did I do? When? Why? All these questions I’m sure are going through your head , passing judgement on me, cutting eye at me, scolding me. Such a bad person right? Come on guys, its a new year, you should know me by now, I don’t think I’m even capable of committing such a crime, LOL, I just wanted to scare you. So now you can finally take a deep sigh of relief or attempt at returning your heart rate back to normal. Right, for all the new people flicking through my blog for the first time, I send my apologies for greeting you with such a deep, spiritual post but for many that know me, you know that’s who I am, deep thoughts, deep emotions, deep beliefs. Now other than the fact I am Christian and want to share my journey with Christ, I’m also very spiritual, very emotional so that’s why I thought this new account would be appropriate for my new followers to get a feeling of who I am.

It was a few days ago actually, December 29th I remember, the date that marks the anniversary of my Grandma’s death and I just struggled to think of a subject to start off the new year, ideas of topics like what I learnt in the previous year, my goals for this new year etc. were meet with sighs of boredom and rolling eyes by the likes of my able proofreader Kwame (don’t worry I have no intentions of baiting you out on here, so let’s stick to that name). So yes, I didn’t want to do the usual, cliche stuff, after all I don’t think that’s me so I let my creative juices flow for a moment or so and stumbled across this topic. This is where the plagiarism comes to play.

Let me quickly give you the background to this topic. December 2011, myself, my younger sister and cousin went on holiday to Canada to spend Christmas with my family there. Whilst there, my uncle being a Minister happened to share some words on this topic ‘Metanoai‘. Now apart from this being an unusual word that at 15/16 had no clue as to what it meant, it soon actually became the basis of our jokes mainly because we struggled to pronounce the word, but it was something that stuck with me, well till now I guess. That day changed my life in a number of ways, changed my way of thinking but it was in writing this post that I thought maybe I have been an offender and committed plagiarism but its family, it doesn’t count right?

So yes ‘Metanoai‘. Metanoai is a Greek word which refers to ‘changing your mindset or purpose’ or to ‘turn and face the light’ or even a ‘transformative change of heart or way of life’. Wow, so many definitions, my apologies for this overload but where am I getting at? For me, it was so so so important to enter the new year with a changed mindset, a different way of thinking and living. I realised the way my mind was set up last year didn’t actually work for me, so me being I was looking for ways to be better, achieve better, love better and live better. But the one thing I actually just picked up on is for you to have a change in your mindset you need to recognise the way your mind was functioning before or the way your thoughts were set up or where your vision was focused on in the previous year was wrong. Wrong in the sense that it wasn’t correct and it didn’t work for you, and even if it did, it didn’t work well enough. Now you see for me, assessing the previous year is so important and I remember back in the day, when I was much younger we used to go round in school saying “New year, new me”. And although I often look back and laugh and even at times make fun of the people that say that (that being wrong in itself) I now want to adopt that attitude. The new year is the time to start a fresh, turn a new slate and that takes me back to the word ‘Metanoai‘ as its used in conjunction with repentance and pertinence. It’s so vital for us to change our mindset, not to dwell on broken relationships, bad friendships, health battles and identity crisis’ but rather look at ways to change our ways of thinking towards the situation and not let it define us.

For me this is a lesson in itself, the last few months of 2015 was as if all the things that hadn’t happened to me throughout the year was saved till the end, the best or in my case the worst was left to the end. And yes, I drowned in my sorrows for a while but I didn’t stay there. As children, as teens, youth and adults it’s hard not to get stuck in the hardships of life but although this may sound cliche but there’s a lesson learnt in every situation whether good or bad. And one thing I tell myself is how can I appreciate the good if I havent experienced the bad? And also how can I take someone somewhere Ive never been? How can I help them?

So why not change your mindset into thinking positively, speaking positively and acting positively also. It’s now time to make things right, and luckily for us, we’ve been given a new year to do so. So when you’re down in the dumps or alone just remember ‘Metanoai – change your mindset’. After all, the mind pretty much controls our whole being so once we can tackle our biggest killer, we’re one step closer to finding our cure’.

 

I hope this new year is your best one yet. So start how you want it to continue.

Yours truly,

 

Praise’ Gbemisola x

The beginning of a new journey

The fact that you’re reading this means YOU MADE IT! You made it into the Year 2016! Can you believe it?

WOW, So here I am at 13:48 or so, scared as anything, nervous, hands shaking, mind wavering, eyes twitching, attempting, just attempting to write. Wow, to think its been over a year since I last released a blog post, since I last recorded my thoughts to you, since I last shared the lessons I had learnt from life. A whole 365 days, 12 months, 52 weeks, 8760 hours, 525,600 minutes has passed. Its crazy but I’m glad to say I’m back. Back with a new vision, new ideas and new stories. Exciting right? So exciting.

You see, there’s one thing I must point out to you all. Now, it was never my intention to stop blogging or even take a break from blogging, in fact I planned to religiously blog twice a week and in some ways I actually did, I was still writing ALOT, I just never posted anything. Why? Life was why. I realised I was just surviving and not living. And I’m sure many of you will be thinking what on earth does that mean? But I was just getting by, getting through each day, hoping and praying that I’d even see the next day rather than taking advantage of the 24 hours we are given and making the most of it, being active, building memories but instead I let the events of life swallow me. Anyways lets not get too deep into that but yeah, once I started slacking, it became something I just put off. Now that doesn’t mean you were not in my thoughts, you always were but even finding the confidence at times to give you an insight into what was going on with me was difficult.

Now, all those that regularly follow my blog will know that after any of my extended abscences I tend to give a list of excuses. But you know what, I don’t want to do that this year. Instead of dwelling on missed opportunities, I plan to make new ones. For you see, hindsight is the best vision. Yesterday can never be better than today or even tomorrow and that’s what I want to live by. Believe it or not, the year out made me examine several areas of my life, my relationships, my goals and the most important one to me, my faith. The one thing I realised is my blog in many ways, helped me get through the struggles of everyday life, and for me, this was one of the top things on my list that I wanted to address first. So here I’ve been, hibernating for the last month or so coming up with fresh ideas, exciting plans and a new vision. Starting with a new name! I no longer wanted to be known as ‘Praise with no Worship’ because I love worship, I’m a singer, LOL. (Lord knows where that name even came from anyways -_-). But  I wanted to keep it all real, I wanted to be open, relatable and honest. So here we have it, the birth of a new name, ‘Its Only P’G’, now I leave it to you to find out what the P’G stands for.

The journey of the past year has been amazing. From me turning 18 and having the most amazing surprise dinner planned by my favourites, to singing in a number of places and functions, to spending Christmas away from home, to Boxing day sale shenanigans, to completing my A Levels, to working, both my parents turning 50, my sister graduating and finally moving to university and even going on to spend my first birthday in a new environment surrounded by new faces. And yes I know, I’m no longer the mere 17 year old teen that originally started this blog back in 2013, I’m now a 19 year old adult. LOL LOL LOL, even I have to pinch myself at times.  But in spite of all this, I’m back guys! I’m back and ready to share my experiences all over again.

Please jump back on this rollercoaster of mixed emotions, funny stories, real life situations, lessons and testimonies and take a trip down the avenue of self discovery, even as I do also. I would love you guys to come back on this journey with me, after all, there’s no one I’d rather share this all with.

Happy New Year Everyone. I hope this year brings nothing but good things for us all! You guys are the best.

 

Yours truly,

Praise’ Gbemisola x

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Up in the air

Do you know the weird thing about not blogging for a month or so?

Well believe it or not, it’s the fact I feel I can’t even remember how to blog or carry you guys along on my train of thoughts! It’s awful. Now, for the excuses…..
You should all know, after every one of my absences, I write a list of excuses to go with why I haven’t been around. However, luckily enough this time I have actually been out and about, doing performances, college work and travelling and not just hibernating! It’s been great don’t get me wrong, but sooo tiring and stressful, that’s why I’m soooo greatful for the recent trip I’ve had away with family and friends, probably the best trip I’ve been on to be fair, but that’s for another post!

So, to answer the question I know a lot of you will be asking, so where have you been? You abandoned us?

Well actually guys I didn’t, you have all been on my mind, from my usual half of the Harris twins who regularly follows my blog, to the randomers out there who just flick through once in a while! The last month or so hasn’t been short of busy! Busy busy busy. I vaguely remember my absence on one Sunday I was meant to upload, however unfortunately I was laid at home, rushed to the hospital coz I was unwell! Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m not looking for your sympathy or worries but just wanted to give you a glimpse into what us 17 year olds go through from time to time. I can hear the screams and see the rolling eyes and twitching lips from adults out there saying “what on earth can a 17 year old got though”. Now let me tell you, in this day and era, age is honestly but a number, you’d be surprised to hear what even a 16 year old goes through. So yes, I was very unwell, but I quickly snapped out of it, being me and all! And now I’m as fit as ever….. Well okay, on the road to a fast recovery!

Now, after this whole episode of being unwell, I dived straight into the next big thing in my life, UNI! The fast approaching 3 letter word that is literally deciding my fate! In the coming year, I’m out of the nest (finally) and going to go onto further education! Now, I’m not going to go into too much detail because again, this is another area I want to address in future blogs but obviously because of my abscence I haven’t been able to (silly me). So yes, I travelled to some unis to go to their open days which were really good and made me the more excited to go! So yes, that was number 2 on my excuse list.

Now, for excuse 3… A lot of you that know me well will know I sing. No, I’m not them type of singers that will just sing, sing, sing! But I sing in a choir, 2 or even 3 in fact! But the main one is part of a choir names NXGN (Next Generation) which is a gospel youth choir who ministers twice a year, sometimes more to a congregation of over 50,000 at the Excel Exhibition Centre in London. Now, as I said we minister twice a year, and our second ministration happens to fall in October which means we have rehearsals every Saturday from the beginning of September until our performance date. The rehearsals are held in Croydon, which means me along with the Luton crew (you guys know who you are) commute from Luton by train and bus, spending a whole day out! Stress I know, so yes, that was the second thing that took my time.

Now, finally the other big thing which is expected is college! Ahhh, how I hate that place! It’s like once you feel you’ve got it and you start enjoying it, they throw a spanner in the works and throw you off course kmt. So yes, between my studies, topic tests, uni applications, visits, talks, meetings, deadlines aswell as extra curricular activities like going to the gym, black history month and house music (choir) it was literally a recipe for disaster! Loosing my voice after overworking myself and singing in London, operating on minimal sleep, rushing to finish work etc. it was awful! And even as I write this, I’m stuck in a plane somewhere in the clouds of Turkey, deeply debating whether I will go to college tomorrow and thinking about the stacks of work that await me at home! Luckily I’m say next to a lovely lovely Turkish guy who dashed me his coins so I’ll buy something to give me energy to at least compose a to do list in my head! (Ohh how I love sitting next to nice people)

So yes, that’s been me the past month… Anyone jealous? Or wanting to trade places? … Yeah I didn’t think so. All the same, I apologise for being gone, if I had my way and my brain chose to cooperate I’d be here writing everyday, however 24 hours at times is not enough! And our body is so fragile, I’d be driving myself to an early death and trust me, I’m toooooo young to die! Lol!

What am I saying? Sometimes life hits you with things you weren’t expecting and causes you to totally go off course! But the beauty in you, and the way you were made is in the ability to return where you previously were, if not further in the race of life! It’s hard I know, but with God all things are possible, right?

Love, Praise’Gbemisola x

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1K Views

So my readers, my fam, friends, enemies, church members, every single one of you!

We have hit the jackpot YAYYY! This post should probably have come out the day I hit the great 1K views but I felt to share it on Sunday, as that’s my normal blogging day!

Guys, I don’t know where to start…… But I guess I have to find somewhere, and for once I’m not emotional! We thank The Lord right LOL

*sigh* Heres the thing, when I started this blog, I didn’t really have a vision as to where I wanted it to go or the direction I wanted to take. I was just writing, most times writing rubbish or recording the thoughts from my head. A blog was something I never thought I’d have. Not that I hate bloggers but the only blogs I really saw were fashion or make up related blogs which evidently wasn’t really my field or interest back then. But 3/4 months on, here I am! Still blogging, and having no intention to stop.

Writing and delivering my thoughts to you was more of something I was doing for myself, to get rid of some of the burdens I had been carrying and lift the heavy weight on my heart. As I’ve said numerous times, last year was a very trying time for me. Yeah, you may say I’m only 17 and all that, but you’d be surprised what us teens go through nowadays, you’d be pleasantly surprised in fact. And the thing is, we often find ourselves in situations where we can’t speak out, or even if we do, we are in fear of who gets hold of that information. Anyways, I put all these worries at the back of my mind and just needed to find some healing within myself. Other than the obvious comfort And encouragement I got from my church and family/friends I found a peace and security in my blog. The ability or gift to relay your emotions and thoughts to a wider audience is one that cannot be described as easy however it deals with issues within yourself before addressing and helping another. So it all starts with you.

Not only that, this blog has been very rewarding, comments, text messages, encouragements, jokes all made in reference to my blog has shown me I am somebody with a talent, a talent people appreciate. And let me tell you, that is one of the greatest feelings. Although I’m still travelling and journeying down the path of self discovery, I’ve managed to learn and find out more about myself through writing to you guys. And honestly, the support network I’ve received from this blog, has encouraged me and motivated me to want to do more, to empower people, to give people a hope, let them know they’re not alone and just advice them. And trust me, I’m not a teacher, or preacher or anything, I’m a child, a sinner just like many of you, but the difference with me is that I have an inner beauty that radiates and gives me wisdom and knowledge above my years, one reason being through my experiences and the second through God. After all, it’s all down to him.

So I just want to say a big big thank you for journeying with me through the past 4 months, the journey has been more and far better than I previously anticipated! Thank you for being a part of my journey and I can only hope and pray I will be a part of yours. I love and appreciate all you guys! Keep reading, keep commenting and bring all your suggestions to me! I would love to here from you guys. Thank you all again for your support.

Here’s to bigger, greater and much better things!

Love, Praise’Gbemisola x

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2 for 1 deal

Okay, as promised, I’m giving you two for the price of one this evening! But before committing to it, I should’ve had a plan in place -_-. All you people that think blogging is easy, you couldn’t have got it more wrong.

Anyways, today I finally got a photographer for my blog posts, and although I’m still sticking to taking pictures with my Iphone, it just felt more real to me! Haha, but yes, positive movements, positive movements! Haha! I dunno what to address on this post but I can only say what I’m feeling and let me just apologise for my humour, I’m currently working on 3 hours sleep from the previous night!

So anyways, like I pointed out in my last post tonight, I’ve been so so so happy lately and no, there’s no boys it involves or girls for that matter, I’ve just been taking time to appreciate the people I have around me, the talents I have, and just the things I love. For so long, I was dwelling on people mistreating me, people that I am glad to say are no longer in my life, I was dwelling on previous failures and let downs, dwelling and being critical of myself, my body, my look! And finally, I can see I’m just loving life, living with not a care in the world. Now, see I’m still yet to find Worship, aswell and Thanksgiving and Offering but that’s okay, I don’t mind! And I’m still yet to get to my target weight and body type but again, it’s fine! I’m still yet to complete my final year of A Levels and although it’s not fine, I know it will be!

Now, if any of you have my in snapchat you’ll know tonight I did the 5 things I hate tag thingy, and although there’s a lot more I hate, there’s even more things I love! I always say, I hate hate hate negativity, I hate negative energy but I know at times that’s what I give out. It’s so weird how we can have soo many conflicting emotions but for some reason the more negative seems to over loud the positive. But no, that’s no longer with me, hell NO! For once I’m going to let the positive outshine the negative, and see where that takes me! You see, you don’t know Jack if you don’t know Jesus! And Jesus just adds that special spice to your life! Don’t let man mash up your life, don’t let girls mash up your life! Get rid of people like that and surround yourself with love, happiness and positivity!

Love, Praise’Gbemisola x

 

Are you ready?

I know this post was meant to go up over an hour ago, well all of you close to me will know I have a Sunday ritual, as it even says in the Bible “Sunday is the day of rest”, well I take that day to the extreme, I do all my chores on Sunday night and literally just laze around on Sunday afternoons, and I have my weekly Sunday nap! Today, I was loving mine abit too much and got carried away but here I am! All ready for you guys!

Now I’m back to my more thoughtful posts, and seeing as I didn’t post on Thursday (lost track of the days in the week), today you are in for 2 posts! Let’s just hope my phone doesn’t die mid typing (20% alert -_-).

I didn’t really have a specific direction for this blog this evening, but I’m just sat here in bed asking myself that am I actually ready for the things that are soon to come in my life? I know I’m currently in such a good place, everything for once seems so good and I’m incredibly happy but is this a joy that will last till death? Well I honestly hope so, and I know I will continue to make the conscious effort to remain this way! I know many of you will read this title and think I’m referring to the rapture and the coming of Christ, and now although that is not really the direction I’m taking, I guess it relates to this indirectly.

Yesterday, I was opportuned to go on a University open day at Loughborough, and it finally dawned on me that I’m leaving the nest! But I thought to myself am I ready to live alone, in a town I don’t know, with people I don’t know, studying a course I currently know little about. But for some bizarre reason I wasn’t fearing the unknown I was more excited for it. Looking around the accommodation I was just like, am I ready to have to compromise my high standards and live in a tiny room, something I’m not currently used to and have minimum wardrobe space, and I know a lot of you girls that are not yet or even at uni can relate.

That takes me on to my next point, the future after that! Now you see, being soon to be 18 and all, a relationship or whatever isn’t exactly what I’m going in search for but it’s something that will always be on my mind? That will I find someone that compliments me, someone that can hold me down! Some of us ladies need someone like that, and I sure know I do! But when I see all my friends in relationships currently, although a part of me would want the same happiness they seem to find in a relationship, the other part just asks myself again that am I ready for the commitment, the arguements, the demands and expectations that comes with a relationship? Am I ready for all of that? And most importantly do I even need that. And to me, the answer I always find myself concluding to is NO! I’m in no rush! You see, the past year or so, I’ve learnt a very very valuable lesson. And what is it you may ask? It’s inevitable that in life we will experience things, it’s inevitable that things cannot always remain good however things can be avoided! There are certain experiences you don’t need to go through, and the reason we find ourselves journeying down paths of sexual immorality or lust or jealousy or greed is because of our own selfish desires. And then when we get discouraged or hurt, we ask ourselves why! And I too, I am terribly guilty of this. Learning from others mistakes is like something you are getting for free because you yourself do not need to experience it, learning from other mistakes is one of life’s best teachers. I always say one thing, I don’t want even my enemies to go through what I have, I don’t want my friends or family too either because they don’t need to! It can be avoided by looking at my life and my experiences and choosing not to want to experience the same! Unfortunately this statement tends to lie with relationships especially! And that is why I ask myself time and time again, that am I really ready? “What does it profit a man, to gain the whole world but loose his own soul – Mark 8:36”. Mate, it profits you nothing! What does it profit you to have a relationship that you see as good but loose yourself in the process! Are you ready for that right now, when you have other priorities? Ask yourself?

And finally, the biggest one, are you really really ready for the future. Marriage, having children, being in the profession you aspired to! This question for me, I know it is currently no and will probably remain this way until I’m journeying down the aisle or in the labour ward! And it’s not that I’m not prepared but I myself know I have a lot of things to put in place within myself before I go down that route. Things like what you may ask? Well, qualities such as patience, reasoning, selflessness, agape love, forgiveness, calmness! All these things, I need to instill within me before I even begin to think of marriage or child birth because if you don’t have things already in place in yourself, well you have a lot of work to do. Just think about this, mornings where you would wake up early to cook your husband breakfast while having an infant you are still breast feeding, whilst thinking about the state of the house and completing the project your company is currently working on. In situations like that, if you don’t prepare and practice now, what makes you think you’ll be ready in even 10 years time. You can’t turn a hoe or lazy person into a housewife and you can’t turn a player into a husband. Unless you make conscious and informed decisions to change and better yourself, you will remain that way. And of course, the foundation you need is based on your relationship with God. That will make all things easier and “all things work together for your good – Romans 8:28”. Get your spiritual life where it needs to be, be solid in your faith! This is so so important because with this, you’ll be ready before you know it! Yes, everyone is a work in progress and I’m still an individual under construction but I know I’ll get there, and you should too!

It all boils down to preparation, even the rapture it all comes down to living a holy life that is “acceptable and pleasing to God”. It’s not that you should only prepare when the time is near, but prepare at all times, so if Jesus was to come now, you wouldn’t be running around thinking where do I start. I remember when I was sitting my Year 6 SATS, all those years ago LOL and an uncle told me “Prayer preparation prevents poor performance”! And wow, these 5 P’s have stuck with me, even more recently before completing my AS studies, another Uncle said “Prepare like you haven’t prayed and pray like you haven’t prepared”. This statement here is like a mind game, in essence it’s saying one thing, when you are reading for an exam you read a lot, so you should read like you haven’t prayed, and pray like you haven’t read! This can apply to everything! Prayer and praise will always remain key to everything but you need to put your work and efforts in.

Now, that’s enough of me rambling but now ask yourself, “Am I Ready” for the things that are to come in my life. If not, begin to prepare and put things in place now.

Love, Praise’Gbemisola x

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